Huge eBay Sale!

Vintage Kitschy Milk Glass Mug - gotta have 'em :)

Note: In honor of this Tennessee coffee mug, here's a couple "I heart TN" songs to enjoy :)

My shoulders have been really tight over the past couple weeks, even after I went to my favorite $19 massage place (where I've realized that they act confused every time you ask for the special, and try to change your mind so you pay more money - not gonna happen). So the tight shoulders made me think about stress, made me think about clenching my teeth, made me think that I left my bite guard at home a month ago when I started housesitting, and maybe it's time for a new one. So yesterday, I bought a new one. Good work, Megan.

Some sort of whiskey + coffee recipe on the back :)

I've been really stressed about money, like constantly worrying about it, and I imagine that this has contributed to the stress I'm feeling in my upper body. I've been worried about the month of July for like six months, which is crazy, right? I've been worried that this July will be like last July, where I made like $500 and couldn't pay my bills. Well, for whatever reason (pure brilliance, perhaps?), I looked around my super-crowded apartment (on a quick trip home to send orders) and realized "Holy shit! I have a lot of stuff in here." I've been working so hard to increase the base number in my shop that I haven't really sifted through the lot to get rid of stuff that hasn't sold.

Anyhoo, I decided that July is the perfect time to have a huge sale in my eBay shop, and clear out stuff that just hasn't sold. And it's been so great! I'm getting rid of stuff. I'm getting momentum, eyes on my stuff, people browsing around. I love it! I'm realizing how necessary it is for me to clean out the attic, so to speak, to clear out my shop, my head, my body, to be willing, at least once a year, to make a change in the status quo, and grease the wheels of my gosh-darn life.

Thanks for stopping by - come again soon :)

Boo. I'm unwell.

Ovenex-style Cake Mold - Starburst Pattern

I really wanted to go out of town today to hit up some stores I don't get to regularly. But I was in the office for thirty minutes when I realized that my energy was very low. I've been feeling lethargic the last few days, with a sore throat, but I haven't actually tried to do anything. So I was sadly disappointed when I realized that there would be no awesome thrifting today in a town far away.

I'm a big fan of listening to your body and giving it what it needs. Sometimes this means not doing something that you really "should" be doing, doing less when you want to do more. But as I always say to myself, "Do you want to be like the celebrities in the hospital for 'exhaustion'?" I even recently spoke with someone who had gotten into such a state that she had to be hospitalized because she'd been running herself ragged.

Anyhoo, it's cold and flu season. Prevention, prevention, prevention!!! That's my motto :)

Tennis balls :)

C'est vrai, mes amis, c'est vrai.

Tonight, the stars aligned and I remembered something my yoga studio does, and I did it at home. We often bring tennis balls along with our blankets, blocks, etc. and use them in class as weird pain-providing devices of torture wherein we place them under particular parts of the body (tight parts), and lie on top of the ball, allowing the full weight of our bodies to press down on the ball, creating a pressure to break up the tension. It can be quite painful, not in a bad way, but in a "this-part-of-my-body-has-never-felt-this-much-pressure" sort of way.

I went into the garage, knowing deep down that I'd seen a tennis ball somewhere. And alas! I found it! And I laid on top of it, with the ball beside my shoulder blades, and I swear to you, I can't remember the time my body felt so relaxed and just good.

Anyhow, you should try it. Peer pressure. Do it. Do it now. Or tomorrow. Whatever.

Black-and-White Thinking

I have not been able to find information on the artist :(

Last summer, almost a year ago, I decided that I had enough oomph in me to tell an ex that I'd been in love with him for a very long time. I'd never told him because it seemed so silly. As time had passed, from teens to twenties, it became more crazy a thought. Then suddenly, one Saturday afternoon in July, I had a chance, and I took it.

Boy did I ever take it. When I got him in front of me, I dumped a decade of thinking on him in a single evening. All of the things I never thought I could say, I said. Suddenly, I had no shame. Those years were behind me; there was no future between us. I figured I would live in the moment and do the thing I thought I'd never be able to do. Except he didn't leave. He stayed and listened. He was kind. And that's where everything went wrong. He told me we could be friends. I told him I could never be his friend - that was the whole point - and then the next day wanted a response. I poured my heart out! I wanted a response! We disagreed vehemently, and that was it. We didn't speak again.

It took me a year (I had to finish graduate school, after all) before I realized what I'd done, that I'd thrown away a relationship just because it didn't fit the mold I wanted it to. I wasn't mad at myself. I understood why I'd done it. I was scared, so very scared, and it was the bravest thing I'd ever done. But the year between then and now was a huge year of emotional growth for me, and suddenly I had more oomph left in me. I called him a couple weeks ago and said I was ready to be friends.

So now I'm trying, in spite of my emotional limitations, to be a friend to someone who I didn't think I could ever feel friendly towards. But somehow my capacity for patience has increased dramatically, and I'm recognizing that relationships can be tricky suckers, and that my black-and-white thinking has kept me from being with people I love. So it's worth the not-knowing. It's worth the gray areas, I think, not because it's easy for me. It's never easy. But I wanted something so much, I think I was willing to let go of my stubbornness. I want to be a person who has good with people, who doesn't have broken relationships all over the place. So, as it often does, this means that I have to let go of unrealistic expectations and go with the flow a little more.

Phew. Life is hard work, folks.

What to do in the heat

Palazzo Pant Jumpsuit - Oh to have the energy to make!

1. Put a fan directly facing you
2. Move slowly - Talk with volunteers at thrift stores
3. Take an afternoon nap/siesta (I like to listen to talk radio)
4. Hydrate regularly (Factor in excess sweating)
5. Expect less of yourself (and others)
6. Exercise early in the morning, or late in the evening
7. Write more: Letters, emails, poems, stories
8. Read more: World news, fiction, non-fiction
9. Forgive quickly (heat psychosis is rampant)
10. Listen to folk music on Pandora (Emmylou Harris, baby!)

What do I do with my car?

Two days ago, I was in a hit-and-run on a local freeway. A large truck was swerving in the far left lane, ran into me on my driver's side, then sped away. There was a fair bit of traffic, and I couldn't move or swerve. It all happened so fast, and for the next several hours, I wasn't quite sure if I had done something wrong, but no, it was an accident, and it sucks, and that's just how it is.

So now my car is in worse shape than ever, and I don't want to deal with it anymore! I just want it to end, this whole car craziness. I don't want to drive a car that people feel compelled to run into (as per this comment last night from a friend: "Yeah, I'd run into that"). This darn rabbit keeps digging me into a deeper financial hole, and all I want is out, out, out!

Yesterday, on a lovely trip to see my parents, and do their laundry (disabled parent = need to be productive in the face of chaos), a friend offered me a non-running 1990 Toyota Corolla which needs the following: serpentine belt, temperature gauge, radiator. It's been sitting in their back lot for at least a year, and was running fine until the aforementioned items exploded from the dashboard (no joke). The car has air conditioning, four doors, and upholstery, all of which I covet. And it may be free (before repairs, obviously). So I'm spending a few days deciding what it will cost to fix, whether or not it's wise to do so, and praying to God that somehow, in some small way, I can be relieved of this mess.

Peace out :)

The brain fog.

Tape dispensing machine. I love those pretty buttons :)

I am in such a brain fog right now. Yesterday was super windy here in my fair city, and our cherry tree broke in half. I heard something fall against my window, and walked outside to see what it was. By the time I made it to the front door, I'd forgotten why I was there. I didn't see the tree until someone pointed it out to me later. I went to yoga soon after, hoping that some static poses would do well for my static-filled brain.

Being out of school does not bother me. I can fill time like no one's business. But my brain is not my friend. I forget things. I can't think. I spend whole minutes staring at the ceiling. I used to do that because I was depressed. Now it feels like I'm resting my brain, but I haven't done anything to rest from. A friend, who also just graduated from a masters program, told me that her blood pressure was suddenly hovering at a ridiculously low level. I think that this is what biofeedback is all about. Our bodies are telling us that they need to rest, and even though it feels like a complete turn-about from where we've just been, it is a necessary part of the recovery process.

I was in school for the better part of five years, and I got pressed to limits I didn't know I had. So now, I'm just going to stare at the ceiling for a while, because I forgot what this paragraph was going to be about.

Peace out mofos.