I can't ask for help

So in my fierce stubbornness, I am occasionally unable to ask for help. Usually it's for parental things (i.e. things that I couldn't ask my parents), like money, or help with a project, or a ride somewhere. Well, this is really never a good thing. I still have piles of boxes in my front room because I've reached the end of my own competence and I can't ask for help. So I'm just stuck.

This isn't entirely childish of me. I used to do everything by myself and never needed anything from anyone. Now, I realize that it's unhealthy for me to live that way, but I'm also still stuck asking the wrong people over and over again, people who don't actually help, who just give lip service to it. I don't know why I keep doing the same wrong thing.

It's so shameful to ask for help. It means that I'm weak, that I can't do everything, that I need other people. But when I ask for help, it means that in order to actually be helped, I have to listen to advice oftentimes, advice that I don't want to hear. So until I'm able to get over my own pride, I'm going to be miserable, being vomited on by a sick crying child, on a bus far from home, because I wouldn't accept the ride I was offered (ah, great metaphor).