Puttin' it all out there, for now

Sometimes, when a person gets married, we the onlookers are expecting certain things. We expect that the couple doesn't live together. We probably even expect that they've never so much as passionately kissed. Clothes have definitely, without a doubt, never come off. Whether we like it or not, we're all a bunch of Puritans who expect that sex is procreative, that no one has sexual feelings outside of babies, and that no one does it very often.

But we know better, whether or not we're willing to admit it. We know better because we ourselves have experienced all the different parts of sexuality, even if we haven't been willing to admit that to ourselves, or to our closest friends. Hiding it does not make it go away. Sexuality is a part of life. Period.

Today, amongst friends, I admitted to having an extensive sexuality library, courtesy of my profession and my super-thrifty skills. I felt kinda funny after admitting that. Also, in a perfect world, I'd write my graduate thesis on single sexuality, but since it can't be anonymous, that's out of the question. By writing about it, I admit to doing it. I admit to thinking about doing it (i.e. being a sexual person). That may all be too much for most people to bear.

But denying it never did anybody any good. Shame is only healthy in very small quantities, and beyond that, it screws us up so royally, we may as well kiss any good future sex life adieu.

Just because it's complicated doesn't mean you throw it away. Own it. Dust it off. Walk tall.